I am ready.
I have never been more ready.
This coming Tuesday I will take my driving license test!
*Hold for applause.
I know! Exciting, huh? Nerve wracking? You bet.
But it's okay. I've wanted to drive ever since I wanted to go places out of walking distance.
But I'm worried about one thing.
I may have mentioned my parent's overprotective nature. Allow me to elaborate.
When I was in third grade there was park across the street, but I was never allowed to go and play there with the neighborhood kids until I was in fifth grade. Even then my mother would hold my hand across the street and then leave me only to check up on me every 15 minutes. And that was completely unnecessary because more then once a kid would say "hey J, why is your mom watching us play soccer from the window?" and when I would look up she would hastily draw the blinds.
I wasn't allowed to cross the street until the summer after fifth grade. And, please give me more credit: I knew better then to ask about the big roads with actual cars, I'm talking neighborhood streets here, where the only think you can get hit by is little Sammy on his bicycle and the old ladies that powerwalk around the block.
See where I'm going with this?
I am counting on this license to be my life flight out of my boring life. But I'm afraid that my parents will, once again, find a way to set so many regulations that I will stay home because it will be too much of a HASSLE to drive anywhere.
But I watch a lot of TV and I read a lot of books.
So even though I've never sneaken (or is it snuken?) out before, desperate times call for desperate measures.
And as Blair Waldorf (if you don't know who she is I have lost all respect for you. just kidding! who said that?):
This one will be different. I need to wait for my moment, and then I'm going black-ops. Off the radar. No accountability. This war I'm gonna win.
Ms. Waldorf, great minds think alike. Please let the producer of your show know that he NEEDS me on his show!!! I would fit in perfectly. Beg, okay? And be sure to let me know what he says.