Apr 28, 2009

No title

I failed my license test.
Third times the charm or something like that.
Good bye interneters- I need to go wallow in own grief.
Anyone up for a pity party?
You know what they say: misery loves company.

Apr 19, 2009

the information age

I am not nosey, as some people would tell you.
I am just really, really, really curious about things that concern other people.
Entirely different things.
And I just wanted to share with you something that really bugs me.
Is it me or am I saying really a lot more than usual?
I hate when there are two people next to you carrying on a very interesting conversation, and you are casually listening in, and someone starts a conversation with you.
I hate this, I hate this, I hate this!
Just when the discussion being carried on next to you is getting really (there I go again!) interesting, somebody always interrupts.
And this is what happened at 11:00 Wednesday morning in Astronomy.
Me: Pretending to be reading my textbook when I'm actually listening in on the group to my left
Someone rude: Heyyyyy J!!!! What's up?
Me: Hmmm? Oh, yeah. Leans a little to the left because they've started whispering
Someone rude: Confused expression at my rudeness. So how was your weekend?
Me: Mhhhhm. Throws pencil in direction of group. Crawls on ground to listen better... er I mean pick up pencil.
Someone rude: Racks brain at why I would possibly be mad at them. Okay. Bye.
Me: Realize that the group I have been eavesdropping on are all staring strangely at me. Hurriedly pick up pencil. Look around for Someone Rude.
The world is full of people that interrupt the conversations you are listening in on, and make you look like a jerk all at the same time.
Gosh darnitt.

Apr 11, 2009

Television has ruined me

I miss Gossip Girl.
There. I've said it. If you are sick and tired of reading about my GG obsession, that I swear to God is NOT an obsession, feel free to click the tiny X in the right hand corner of the page.
You're still here!
Now I can safely assume that you're secretly obsessed with GG, too. Please humor me.
Monday April 27th is the season finale. And I don't know what I'll do.
Of course I'll watch it, with a huge bag of Salt and Vinegar chips, and vanilla ice cream, and afterwards I will cry myself to sleep and mourn the loss of my best friends forever.
Omg. That is incredibley sad, I know.
But true.
So very, very true.

Apr 3, 2009

It was ridiculous of me to think that I could say goodbye without crying. It was ridiculous of me to think that I could, somehow, despite how apart of me you are, be nonchalant about it. I really don't know what I was thinking.
Did I really think I could say goodbye to my other half, my sister in crime, my Hollywood like best friend forever, without losing a part of myself?
There's a whole in my chest, and it hurts like hell. I think my heart is breaking; let me explain. I am not some wimpy girl crying over a boy she has known for two weeks and convinced herself she would marry. I am a girl hurting over the loss of her sister. I am a girl whose had a part of her ripped out, and haphazardly stapled and glued and paper clipped together.
Hold my hand and let's dance across the pages of our memories. Slip back into time and watch our time together from a different angle. Let's set the soundtrack of our time together on repeat, and this time, let's sing at the top of our longs, regardless of how tired we are, or how many times we've heard the song before.
People are meant to be together. It's cruel to bring people together only to violently rip them apart. We're good together. I wouldn't call us two halves of a whole: we're not so alike. But were like two polar opposites that go well together. Like ketchup and Mac and Cheese. Like apple juice and oranges.
I'm empty inside, like a deflated bike tire. You know the feeling where you really want cereal, but there's no milk? It's been like that times infinity.
The hurt won't heal overnight, maybe not even at all. But it will get easier. It always does. Or at least that's what they tell me.
I wish I could keep everyone I loved right here, right next to me, for always.
But I can't, and you're gone, and I'm sad.
I miss you.
It's tangible.
It's not a feeling, but a big, heavy brick in the center of my being.
I miss you.

Apr 2, 2009

Oh em geee!

Busy, busy, busy, busy bee!
I've been busy! Which means I haven't been bored.
Which means, I have had fun things to do, and people to make fun of, and plenty of interesting stories to tell!
And I will tell them. Don't you worry.
Just not now.
On account of the fact that I have to go back to being busy.